Mar 9

Mar 9 5 Things I Love

I have written previously on this blog about podcasts and how much I enjoy them. You can read about that in Video Killed the Radio Star. One of my more recently discovered podcasts that I really enjoy is called Chewin' It with Kevin and Steve. This podcast is hosted by two friends, Kevin Heffernan and Steve Lemme, who just chew the fat and have a few laughs. For those of you who don't know, these two gentlemen are part of the group that created movie classics like Super Troopers and Beerfest.

One of the topics that the guys discuss is just called "10 Things I love" where the guys literally go through a list of ten things they love. It isn't complicated but just a list of things that the guys really enjoy in life. Some examples from their podcast include Fantasy Football, Drinking on Thanksgiving, and long poops while reading the newspaper. This podcast list inspired me to create my on list of things I love. I cut it down to five so not to bore you with too many things. This is by no means an all inclusive list so I'm sure there are things that I have left out. You should also know that I have excluded my wife, my kid, my cat and my dog from the list because that is just too simple. These loves also take away from the possible humor of the list. Let's get started.

1. Going to the movies alone - There are some people that refuse to go to movies on their own. They think it is some sort of statement on the number of friends they have or their ability to get a date. That is total rubbish. You do realize that you are going to a movie, right? You are about to spend approximately 2 hours in a dark room with absolutely no talking. Why do you need someone else to go with you?

That is why I love going to the movies alone. First of all, I usually like to go see crazy action movies that center around superheroes or overly muscled men. There isn't much of a plot to the movies I go to just things blowing up or guys flying around punching other guys that are flying around. I understand that this isn't very interesting to a lot of people so there is no need to punish them when I can go and spend some quality time with the screen.

Second, you can get whatever snacks and drinks you want without worrying about the looks you may get from the people with you. The tubs of popcorn you get at a movie theater are not meant for human consumption. I usually try to order a small popcorn and a small soda but who can pass up the up-sell to a barrel of popcorn and a vat of soda for only a nickle? With prices that good you have to get the popcorn that could feed most of Arizona.

I'm not saying that I don't love going to the movies with other people but sometimes you just need some alone time with Jason Statham, more popcorn than the vault at Orville Redenbacher's mansion, and no pants.

2. Quiet Sunday morning reading - Long before Cece was born I enjoyed the peace of a quiet house early in the morning. Even now I wake up early every morning so I can enjoy that quiet. During the week I'm up at 5:00am to shower and get downstairs where after cooking breakfast I'll spend some time reading, writing, or watching a 90's sitcom on Netflix. Even on the weekends I'll get up no later than 6:00am to get the day started.

Sunday mornings are usually the most relaxing and quiet time. During the week I can only relax but so much because I know I'll have to go to work at some point. Saturday usually has some event plan (shopping, get together, etc.) that I have to get ready for. But Sunday usually is the most relaxed day of the week. I can grab a cup of coffee, head into the library, sit down in a comfortable chair, and do some reading. Sometimes I read the news, others a magazine, but most often it is whatever book I'm reading at the time. The quiet is relaxing. The warm beverage on a chilly winter morning is relaxing. The books is relaxing. It's a great feeling. Excuse me. I need to go read.

3. Chin-pillows - The first step here is to explain a chin-pillow. When I was a kid I had a Cabbage Patch kid named Geoffrey. I took that little guy everywhere. I had an entire dresser drawer full of clothes for him. My favorite outfits for him were (1) his pajamas and (2) his football uniform. Even though I'm not a huge football fan I like to put Geoffrey's helmet on and then smash my head into his head wearing the helmet. I know, that explains a alot.

Every night I would sleep with Geoffrey (and my Pound Puppy Trey). You can tell I slept with him every night because to this day the back of his head is flat from sleeping in bed with me. I would pull him up close under my chin and fall asleep. The only way I could fall asleep was if I had Geoffrey comfortably positioned underneath my chin.

As I grew up and aged out of sleeping with stuffed animals I still needed something under my chin to feel comfortable. That is where a chin-pillow comes into place. A chin-pillow is nothing more than a regular pillow that I have shoved under my chin for head support and comfort while I sleep. There is nothing better than laying on your stomach with a pillow under your head and another shoved under your chin.

4. Cargo Shorts - There is nothing that feels more constricting than wearing pants. They are tight around your legs all the way down to your ankles. They never feel good when you have to sit down. There is never a right temperature to wear them. For me, if it is cold enough to wear pants then it is so cold that even wearing pants won't help.

I could wear a skirt or a kilt. In fact I would love to get my hands on a kilt in the tartan of the Clark Clan but that is really expensive. A skirt doesn't provide the necessary pocket space I need in order to carry all my daily necessities. That is why cargo shorts are the best garment for the lower extremities.

Cargo shorts provide the loose fitting comfort of a skirt with the cargo room of a small ocean liner. I can carry my wallet, keys, cell phone, water bottle, Rizzo's wallet, Rizzo's cell phone, sunglasses, an extra slice of cheesecake, travel beers, a small toolkit, tire jack, and matches and still feel perfectly comfortable and relaxed. It may not be fashionable (it was in 1996) but there isn't a more comfortable and useful garment known to humankind.

5. Fast Food - It is no wonder that I got as fat as I did with my love of fast food. I'd bet that most people like fast food but don't love fast food. For the purposes of this exercise try to take your ethical and moral standards out of the argument (believe me, I understand that the meat used at McDonald's isn't from the local farmer's market and I'm sure Wendy's doesn't avoid getting GMO-free potatoes). I'm talking strictly taste. Most people just like fast food. I really, truly, and honestly love the taste of fast food.

There is nothing better than going to Wendy's and getting the Spicy Chicken Sandwich combo with a biggy (large) fries and a soda pop. It is delicious. McDonald's makes a chicken nugget that has wonderful flavor and is perfect for eating and driving. A nice Arby's roast beef sandwich can really hit the spot.

When I was in middle school, my good friend Coby and I would go to the Roy Rodger's across the street nearly every day after school. We would get the same sandwiches, top them with the same toppings, and enjoy every trans-fat filled bite. When I was even younger living in Georgia I remember going to Wendy's on Sunday after church (yes, believe it or not, there was a time I went to church) and I remember every delicious bite of that burger. The point is that I love the taste and the memories of fast food. I don't eat that much fast food anymore but only due to health or ethical beliefs that I hold. If fast food was magically made healthy and made with locally sourced and ethically produced ingredients I would be there everyday.

What do you love? What are some of the small things that bring you pleasure in this crazy, mixed up world?