Dear Jerks

Dear Jerks,

I’m writing as a person that shares the trails in our neighborhood. We are all dealing with a lot right now. We are all trying our best to keep our family safe and healthy. We are all cherishing those fleeting moments we get outside to breathe some fresh air. We are also exceptionally lucky to have some beautiful trails literally steps from our home that allows us to hear a babbling brook, see birds flying by, and smell honeysuckle in the air.

So, why must you disrespect your neighbors and your environment by throwing your garbage around? Don’t get me wrong, I love to sit by a stream to enjoy the peaceful sounds while enjoying an adult beverage. But I don’t get so relaxed that my first instinct is to throw my empty cans into the stream. You were clearly capable of carrying the napkins out to the sandy beach to have a snack. What was so hard about carrying it back to your house and getting rid of it in the appropriate place? It’s bad enough that a spiky little bastard called COVID-19 is trying to kill us. Do we really need to pollute our water as well?

Speaking of that little shit commonly known as Coronavirus, do you really think you are protected if you chuck your mask on the side of the trail? Here is a little tip, your mask won’t work unless it is actually covering your face and nose. It may be hard to believe, but discarding your mask in the mud in the woods does absolutely nothing to protect you from COVID-19 but it goes a long way in showing how much of an asshole you are.

You aren’t the only one that is back in the woods to find a brief respite from the troubles of the world. My family walks those trails daily to get some fresh air and exercise. We don’t need your trash. The world is tough enough as it is. Have some common decency and pick up after yourself, you filthy animals.

Sincerely,

Wes