Under the Knife

It has been over a year since I have been inspired to write on this funny little page. A lot has changed that has caused me to slow down on blogging. I’ll get to that in another post. There is something specific that has drawn me back into the desire to write a few words occasionally. I have to go under the knife!

On Monday, February 10th, I woke to some pretty uncomfortable feelings in the groin (you’re welcome for that image). I knew what it was the moment I stood up in the morning. I’ve had this feeling before. Granted, it had been 33-years since the last time I felt something like this but it is the kind of feeling you never forget. A hernia.

For those of you who don’t know, Healthline describes a hernia as occurring when, “when an organ pushes through an opening in the muscle or tissue that holds it in place. For example, the intestines may break through a weakened area in the abdominal wall. Many hernias occur in the abdomen between your chest and hips, but they can also appear in the upper thigh and groin areas.” Sounds like fun, right? Well let me tell you, it is not.

I immediately scheduled a doctor’s appointment. My doctor didn’t take long to confirm my suspicion but also gave me instructions to get an ultrasound. That was a first for me. I’d seen Rizzo get an ultrasound many times with our two kids but I’d never felt the goop on my own stomach. So on Thursday, February 13th, I was off to the technicians office to get probed.

Another short stint with my pants around my ankles provided proof that a hernia was allowing some fatty tissue (doesn’t that just sound enticing?) through my abdominal wall and into my scrotum (again, you’re welcome). With the holiday weekend just around the corner it took me another eight days before I was able to get into the office with the surgeon.

During that eight day period I started to feel guilty about all the trouble my body was causing. Or, to be more accurate, the lack of trouble my body was causing. Granted, I hadn’t performed any strenuous activity since February 9th, the day before the first pain. During that time I hadn’t worked out or even gone so far as to carry laundry up and down the stairs (sorry Rizzo). I was starting to feel like I didn’t even have a hernia and I just had pulled a muscle or something. There wasn’t any pain to speak of as I walked into the surgeon’s office.

After five minutes I knew that it wasn’t just in my head. I turned my head and coughed while the doctor examined my abdomen. No pain, I was good to go. I turned my head and coughed as he examined just above my groin. No pain, I was good to go. I turned my head and coughed as he examined my inner thigh. No pain, I was good to go. Then he said, “This will be uncomfortable,” as he examined, how should I say this gently, my right ball. I turned my head. I coughed. I doubled over in pain.

Yep, that was the spot. It felt like I was hit directly in the crotch with a foul ball. I wanted to throw up. At least I didn’t have second thoughts about needing to get this fixed. I mean. UGH!!!!!

So, in four days from time I’m writing this I’ll be heading into surgery. I’ll have three incisions across my abdomen. I’ll get one hernia repaired on the right side and they will explore the left just to make sure that side is OK. Then I’m off to a six-week recovery stint.

That is the real reason I’m starting back up on this blog. Since I was last here I had let my diet get slightly away from me. At one point I had lost over 60 pounds from my highest weight. I’ve added back about 20 of those pounds. I’m pretty okay with those results since I was still very active. I would run three times a week and workout at OrangeTheory twice a week. Exercising that much allowed me to each and drink basically anything I wanted without gaining back much more than the 20 pounds.

However, now I’ll be very limited in my exercise so I’ll have to be hyper-diligent about my eating. That means it is back to Weight Watchers and back to being extra cautious. It also means accountability. I used this blog as a way to scare me into staying on my path. I knew I would have to report my results to the world so I made sure not to get out of control. I’m going to do that again.

So, dear readers, get ready for lots of boring blogs about how hungry I am and how I want to eat. I’m going to get really obnoxious. You’re welcome.

I hope you enjoy it. I’ll make sure to include pictures of my scars.